Tuesday, July 12, 2011

The Bachelorette.

I can't resist any longer. I have so many opinions about the Bachelorette and no one wants to hear them all but I can't hold them in any longer.

Ok, Ashley, lets just pick JP and get this all over with. We all know he is the best candidate so therefore just pick him. You have been breaking the rules all season so just break some more and skip the rest of the season. He is just so perfect....but on second thought...maybe he should be the next Bachelor and some how I can apply to date him? Like really, he was so jealous of you with the other guys and I think that is so adorable!!! And I know jealousy is not supposed to be attractive but JP can make anything attractive.

Ames is like a super nerd but in such an endearing way. He is very sweet but all of your interactions seem so awkward so we know you won't pick him. Plus his educational background seems a little snotty...and keep in mind that this is coming from a girl that has gone to a private school (that has a reputation for being snotty) for most of her whole life...

Remember when Constantine said he wasn't really falling in love with you? And how he mostly just say you as a friend? That does not bode well for a marriage...unless you have made a marriage pack with your friend like "If we both aren't married when we are 40 we will get married."
But you did have a serious fairy tale moment when you let off that lantern like you were in Tangled. Jealous much. I almost wish some disney music would have been playing the background..

Ben is pretty good. I actually like him quite a bit. But what did you two do that whole night when he was gone??? Well I know what you might have done...but really? Super inappropriate if you did.  I have a suspicious feeling you might pick him but I just don't approve of that. Unless him hometown date is super awesome then you better not pick him. I just don't think you two "fit" together. And that is a serious factor in any relationship. Any pictures you take together have to look good and I don't think yours will. Sorry to break it to you.

Emily, why are you interrupting my viewing of the Bachelorette??? I watched the whole season you were on and I have had enough of your drama. You broke up...I think it would be better for you if you just moved one with your life. And PLEASE DO NOT come back to be the Bachelorette. I have a tiny feeling that you might be a tad bit fake and I don't want to have to deal with you any longer.  Also, Brad has the personality of a piece of cardboard and yet you chose to marry him??? It would be kinda awkward if he was just like "please sit down"  "Please watch your step" "Please please please" all the time. A person can only be so polite!!!

All right, I feel much better that I have gotten all of those feelings off of my chest...

Also Ashley. Some of your date choices are super bad. Boxing...really...is this what was going through your mind "guys are already fighting over me so lets make them literally fight each other. I think that will ease all the tension"? NOOOOOOOOOO worst idea ever. I don't care if it was culturally appropriate. Bad idea!!! Another terrible date happened in this last episode. (inside Ashley's brain again) "All of these guys are already thinking about marrying me so I am going to tempt them by taking wedding pictures with them.  And them the guy that I like the best will get the most normal outfit so we can practice for when we really get married and i will give the other guys super crazy outfits. Sound perf!!!"  Wowww. That might have been as bad as the boxing. It was just so awkward.

Now I am really done with my rant.

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